So every time I think things are going to be okay, some more shit happens. I am so mentally drained and exhausted. I say on more occasions than one that I just want to be happy. I invested a lot in my future; I went to college, I earned two degrees (almost a PhD) and somehow I have ended up in a role that tests my patience on a daily basis. I argue with a 14 year old on a daily basis to the point that I have chest pains and I am so tired, every day that I just cannot adult.
Let's bring it back for a moment. I am a single mother. I wanted my kiddo to go to a school that would give her some options and a little bit because they have money, so I moved to Ankeny, IA. Such a bad decision. This school district is awful. The kids do not understand that life is not this perfect bubble that will not pop unless they are full of assholes. I have had to deal with arguing with my kid every day to get her to get up to go to school. Then I learned, we don't have to do that; pulled her out and placed her in online school and now I am doing the work of an individual who went to school to teach.
I have had my kiddo call me because I was running behind to pick her up, yell at me because she was threatened by an ass wipe of another black kid that she was going to stab her. Guess now is a good time to explain that I am black and my kiddos sperm donor is white and we made her. So many more issues to discuss.
Then there is the fact that Ankeny does not have any single guys that have ever dated outside the race of white. Now this is annoying to me because a woman is a woman and the fact that people still have issues with interracial date pisses me off.
I am angry. I am that angry black woman who is tired of having to explain myself. We are killed off on every occasion and no one feels bad. NO ONE.
I am so tired of being disrespected and treated like I do not have feelings and if this continues, it may not end well.
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